Think about those people you meet and immediately feel drawn to. Consider presenters and individuals who establish an instant connection with you. They have charisma - a quality that can be cultivated rather than being innate. It involves our interactions with others while remaining authentic to ourselves.
Each person has a unique story or stories, and how you tell yours can influence how others see you.
It can determine whether people remember you, how interested they are in you, and how effectively you build connections.
Charisma is about being genuine, taking purposeful actions, and telling stories skillfully.
There are various courses, books, and coaches dedicated to the art of charisma.
I want to emphasize that the formula is simple but requires effort. By dedicating yourself and preparing well, you can embody charismatic qualities.
Master the art of storytelling.
Have you ever noticed how two people can tell the same story - one keeps you engaged, while the other leaves you uninterested? It all comes down to the delivery.
I've caught myself leading people through a long-winded story, drowning them in unnecessary details - their eyes glazing over, looking at their watches, trying to escape the conversation or meeting. It's a common mistake - launching into a story without proper preparation leads to aimless rambling and losing your audience.
The captivating stories you hear are often well-rehearsed.
Remember, both what you say and what you leave out are crucial. As Winston Churchill once said, which still holds true today: "If I had more time I would have written you a shorter letter."
While you shouldn't script everything, having a few concise 30-second anecdotes ready for initial introductions can be very valuable.
Body Language
Have you ever been told that using expansive body gestures can make you seem more confident? I've heard this advice before, but what I discovered through my own experience was even more impactful. Not only did I convey a sense of confidence and ease to others, but I also internalized these feelings myself.
Want to learn more about power poses/expansive body gestures here
Listen more than you talk
Previously, I mistakenly thought that being charismatic meant talking constantly, but that's not the case. In reality, building meaningful relationships with important individuals involves deep listening. When someone feels truly heard, they feel valued.
Nodding, leaning in, and displaying facial expressions are effective ways of charismatic listening.
Pay close attention to what others are saying. Nod while they speak to show your focus and understanding. Also, rephrase their words during the conversation.
If you want to know more about charismatic listening, click here
Reflect others' behavior.
Charismatic individuals often use mirroring as a non-verbal technique to connect and show empathy. It involves intentionally or naturally imitating or adjusting your verbal and non-verbal cues to align with those of another person. This can include mirroring their tone, speed, volume, and vocabulary, or syncing with their body language, gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact
Spread positivity
Simple acts of kindness, genuine care for others, and smiling are all effective ways to spread positivity. The key is to ensure that these actions come from a sincere place. I've found that when I take a moment to genuinely acknowledge someone, asking them how their day is going or giving a heartfelt compliment with a warm smile, I receive a lot of positivity in return.
Your energy and aura, even if invisible, can greatly influence how charismatic you are perceived to be.
Here are some examples of spreading positivity
Keep practicing regularly.
Charisma is a skill that can be developed. It takes dedication and repetition, but you can improve your charisma beyond your current level if you're willing to put in the work.
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